Saturday, February 14, 2004

Well it did snow here in Texas, about 5 inches worth. Now, in our last episode, we were about to enter my later Presbyterian years after I graduated from Duke.

(And sorry if I seem to be telling my life story. All this background will become more relevant when I get into discussing issues relating to the Anglican Communion and my search for a church.)

At that point, I shed the Dukish propensity toward benign neglect of everything outside the Duke campus. I became more active in Blacknall Presbyterian and more aware of goings-on in the denomination and affiliated organizations.

It didn’t take me long to become quite provoked by actions of the denomination (the southern Presbyterian Church in the U. S., which merged with the United Presbyterian Church toward the end of my Blacknall years. I think I got the names right.). Their support of abortion really infuriated me, as did the affiliated National Council of Churches’ support of pro-Communist organizations. (The Cold War was very warm during the 80’s although, unknown to almost anyone, it was close to ending. And, yes, I was very anti-Communist. I still am, but I don’t foam at the mouth quite as much.)

Now Blacknall itself was quite evangelical, but I gradually became more disturbed by what I saw there. For one thing, I thought we were a bit sloppy about who we affiliated with and supported. We supported the CROP Walk run by Church World Service, an arm (at least at the time) of the NCC with the same propensity for giving aid to Communists. Then there was a Sunday when a visiting preacher said something like, “We don’t believe the Bible; we believe the Jesus behind the Bible.� I gave her an ear full about that afterwards.

More importantly, I became aware that the pastor and some other leaders did not have the same view on Biblical authority as I. I believe in inerrancy. He did not and had no problem saying so. I saw this as a problem for Blacknall in the long run. I shared Francis Schaeffer’s view that inerrancy is a watershed issue. (I’m still an inerrantist, but my views have moderated slightly, which I’ll discuss in due time.)

After a few years, I did not think my participation in Blacknall was adequately appreciated. I know, I know -- sounds like whining. But it got ridiculous at times. One summer, I was to help teach 4th – 6th grade Sunday School. The education director at the time got on my case before the summer even started. Among other things, she lectured that I was to be under the authority of the woman leading it. I said, fine – I had no problem with that. (I had issues with women in certain other leadership roles, as you’ll see. She didn’t like that, and I suspect that’s why she brought it up.)

Well, it turned out the alleged Sunday School leader never showed up on Sunday. So I started taking my plans to the non-leading leader beforehand for her approval and then led the kids myself. This went on all summer. And it was fun, and the kids were great. Thinking about it, I kinda miss them, dang it. Still, it was a bit of work to lead without the authority to lead. You might say I was leading from behind. But I did a good job, doggonit!

Yet at the end of the year, there was a thank you list in the church bulletin of supposedly all the people who helped with Sunday School. My name wasn’t on the list. And I never got a thank you (much less an apology) from the education director. That hurt. And it had a corrosive effect on my attachment to Blacknall. In hindsight, maybe I should have chalked it down to one education director who was clueless on how to handle volunteers and not let it bother me so much. But I didn’t, and it did bother me. Yeah, I was more sensitive about such things back then than now.

Then there was the biggest dispute during my time at Blacknall – women elders. We had never had women elders, and I opposed having them. The elder board wanted them, however.

My biggest concern, though, was that if we had women elders, that it be by consensus. And I recommended that the election be structured that way. (In the Presbyterian Church, the congregation elects elders.) Yet the opposite was done. My memory is a little fuzzy, and I want to be careful what I say. But the election was structured in such a way that it would have been highly unlikely for a woman not to be elected elder.

In any case, a woman whom I highly respected was elected. But the episode was much more a power play by her backers than it was consensus building, or at least I saw it that way. Some pillars of the church left afterward. (I didn’t. And woman elders are even less of an issue to me now.)

Well, all those areas combined led me to consider finding another church and leaving Blacknall after eight years there. But at about the same time, I decided to move back to Texas, so it became a moot issue. I think I would have left Blacknall if I stayed in North Carolina.

And when I moved to Texas, I swore (or the Biblical equivalent) I would never join another mainline Presbyterian church again, nor a church belonging to any mainline denomination, no matter how evangelical the local church was. I was sick of my own denomination using the name of Christ to support evil, such as abortion.

No, not a happy ending. But I have no hard feelings toward Blacknall. And it’s still quite evangelical, if not more so. My expectations that it would go downhill were mistaken. And their services are excellent. I have no problem recommending a visit to it, one reason I’ve mentioned it by name. When I visit the Durham area, I go to either Duke Chapel (I love the stained glass and cranking organ) or Blacknall.

Soon, I’ll tell of my search for a church in the Dallas area in 1988. It was very different than my current search.

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